


King Carter

by Precipice



Series: The D'sney Mythos [1]
Category: Cthulhu Mythos - Fandom, Cthulhu Mythos - H. P. Lovecraft
Genre: Basically a parody of the Disney song 'Prince Ali', Gen, I REGRET NOTHING
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-25
Updated: 2013-04-25
Packaged: 2017-12-09 11:19:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/773621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Precipice/pseuds/Precipice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Randolph Carter returns to the Dreamlands to claim the throne of the city Ilek-Vad. </p><p>Pickman helps.</p>
            </blockquote>





	King Carter

__"Make way for King Carter!  
Say hey! It's King Carter!  
  
Hey! Clear the way to the old Ilek-Vad.  
Hey you!  
Let us through!  
This ain't your doomed Sarnath!  
Oh come!  
Be the first of your pals to gawk and stare!  
  
Make way!  
Here we come!  
Ring a bell! Bang a drum!  
Are you gonna like this guy!  
  
King Cart-ehr!   
A fabulous sir!  
(Also called Randolph.)  
He's making his bow, you're gonna say 'Wow!'.  
Just wait and you'll see!  
Now, try your best to stay cool.  
Don't be freaked out by the ghouls.  
Just come and meet his peculiar coterie!  
  
King Cart-ehr!  
An adventurous sir!  
(He's also called Randolph.)  
Brave as ten regular men, definitely!  
He faced the scary moon-beasts,  
Which numbered a hundred at least.  
Guess who turned out to be smarter?  
Why, King Carter. (Yay!)  
  
He's got seventy-five sneaky Zoogs. (Ooo-oh!)  
(Don't they look freaky, Nasht?)  
Purple Nightgaunts  
He's got fifty-three.  
(Fabulous, Kaman-Thah, love the horns!)  
When it comes to exotic-type critters...  
"Has he got a zoo?"  
Don't be a fool!   
They're all part of his company.  
  
King Cart-ehr!   
Such an elegant sir,  
(Hey, this Carter's a cutie.)  
For a guy named Randolph.   
(So polite and so very nice and not very snooty.)  
That physique! How can I speak...  
Eh, he's sorta weak in the wrists.  
(Everything about the man is just plain endearing.)  
Well, come out and join the masses.  
(He's a champ, he's a star, he's a Dreamer!)  
And bring your opera glasses.  
(And he sure looks like a winner!)  
All to better fawn over King Carter!  
(And I absolutely love the garb he wearing!)  
  
He's got ninety-five black Ulthar kitties  
(He's got the kittens, let's see the kittens!),  
And to pet them they let him with glee!  
(He's fearless, so fearless!)  
He's got friends in all kingdoms and cities -  
To save his skin or attend his whim...  
At least to a certain degree.  
  
King Cart-ehr!  
A kingdom-less sir!   
(His dad named him Randolph.)  
Heard Ilek-Vad has a throne easy to sit on!  
And that, good people, is why  
He got the Silver Key and dropped by  
With sixty ghouls and Nightgaunts galore  
With his gugs and ghasts (for the sake of contrast),  
With his cobblers and tailors,   
A sommelier and some sailors,  
And his kittens that murder on key.  
  
Make way   
For King   
Carter!"   
  
"Seriously, Pickman, was all this necessary?"


End file.
